Once again a superfluous public relations event stipulated by our contract of employment was fortuitously interrupted by villains attempting to attack the city. This time we were engaged in a televised interview with a metahuman journalist when aliens attempted to appropriate the Field Museum and its contents for themselves.
I must confess that I was perplexed at the responses in various media to our interview; I thought that I came across as quite reasonable and well-spoken. Then again, Dark Frost was laconic as is his standard operating procedure, while Agent Grey and When seemed unable to agree on anything. I pointed this out to them at the time, but they refused to heed my advice, until finally I was forced to transmit a jamming signal to When’s verbal enhancement device in order to allow to the interview to proceed. But it was at just that point that I detected radio transmissions describing the aforementioned alien assault upon the Museum. Once we arrived at their curious ship, their robots attempted to delay us with obfuscatory legal arguments, but their most unconvincing mannerisms finally led Dark Frost to lose his temper and lash out at them. As illogical as it was to resort to violence when the discussion had not yet run its course, the tactic was successful in this case. For the aliens were not reappropriating their cultural heritage, but were mere pirates seeking to claim their prize by subterfuge.
While Grey and When managed to prevent the pirates on the ground from successfully completing their operation, Dark Frost and I managed to not only eliminate the command & control apparatus of their vessel, but also to disable its propulsion capabilities.
However, the extremely inferior engineering of the vessel led to a catastrophic warp core breach which would have undoubtedly endangered the civilian populace below had I not absorbed the excess gamma rays emitted from the matter/antimatter annihilation event. Still, the event must have been quite noticeable from throughout the city—I calculate that the peak luminosity of the flash was on the order of 3.01 × 10^27 Joules/second. In light of the significant damage I could have sustained if the core had been larger, I have decided that it would be logical to invest in redundant data storage and nanofabrication facilities to which my AI programming and neural record can be downloaded.
Finally, since reconstituting my form after my nanobots were dispersed by the explosion, I have been monitoring increasingly disturbing social media messages and other publications in various media. While much of the city hails us as heroes and thinks in particular that my destruction of the Stellar Buccaneer was “totally f*ing badass”, there are still those who express dismay not only at our recent heroic actions, but at the very existence of the Second City Supers as an entity. In response, I decide to communicate by direct, personal e-mail with each of the individuals who receives messages via the 2,701,705 active email addresses in or near Chicago. They were each told that such concerns are illogical and unfounded, that the burst of radiation (intense as it was) did neither them nor me any significant harm, and that the upper limit on the increase of local incidences of cancer is (with 90% confidence) no more than a trivial 0.8% over the next ten years. But still, many refuse to listen to my eminently reasonable analysis. Whether these individuals are exhibiting cognitive impairment sufficient enough to warrant professional psychological diagnosis or treatment will require further data collection and analysis.